Can we get real honest about fear in our lives? Ok, good...here we go!
Fear is a dangerous liar.
I can remember many times early on in my childhood when I would let irrational fear take over my thoughts and drive my behaviors. (Scary shadows in the dark can later become scary people in the meeting.)
Of course, I didn't know my fears were irrational at the time, but I carried these fears with me into adulthood. And they began to morph and manifest in different, destructive ways.
The problem really began to set in when others who didn't have those same fears began to notice and question my perspective and perception.
At first I felt like they didn't care about me, or how I felt about the things I was "afraid of."
But, when I got to a point (it took years) when I could actually begin to take an objective look at my own thoughts, I even began to notice the inconsistencies and even some contradictions.
Maybe I didn't appreciate or prefer the communication style of the person pointing out those same inconsistencies and contradictions, but, they weren't wrong in the facts they were pointing out.
At that point I had a choice.
To deflect and project my "personal issues" onto someone who was trying to help, or take their words into deep reflection and consider their relevance to my now known irrational beliefs and behavior.
I mean, when truth presents itself it's very difficult to ignore it...it never goes away. It doesn't just disappear. It may not even feel "good" at first, but, remember, truth is truth, not an emotion or feeling...
So there came a point when I was challenged, truth was right smack dab in front of my face, and my next move would make or break the trajectory of my life as I knew it.
I was tired of being lied to; I was tired of living in fear's grip. After all, it caused nothing but depression, anxiety, panic, physical pain and self-doubt and wrecked my self-image.
Others could see the unhealthy result of fear dominating my life, but had no idea or concept of what those fears were or why they even existed. Why would they?
It took some very special people who walk this earth to communicate and connect with me and speak truth over the lies I was living by to help me break free.
People need people; good people who aren't afraid to tell you what you probably don't want to hear but desperately need to know.
These are the people that will walk beside you as you start to unravel...unravel the lies and the tight, unhealthy grip you had keeping you stuck in a mindset that was literally causing physical and emotional distress.
They're the people who remind you where you're at in the process when you start to question the pain of unlearning old destructive thinking and the challenges new thinking brings.
They celebrate growth and give grace on the tough days. There will always be more tough days on the road ahead, but, they hopefully begin to become less frequent in between the good and great.
It's a process. No, it's a lifelong journey; and one that was never meant to travel alone.
Fear is a dangerous liar, but it can most certainly be defeated.
Don't allow yourself to accept destructive fear as an acceptable part of your life.
You deserve to live free, even in your own mind.
Always rooting for you,